Two halves

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While communicating with a good friend, the phrase ‘the other half’ popped up. The two words intrigued me. (it is a math sort of thing, so bear with me—not bare, Keith! Sheesh.) OK, if I have half a cup of something and add another half of a cup, I logically get a whole cup (not doing liquid measures, those things can really throw off measurements!). All across the world halves exist and when paired with another half of the same kind, become a whole. It is symmetry and algebra and fractions. (An absolute muddle to someone who can muss up basic math at the drop of a prime number.)

With people, the halves to a whole make a better unit. The two shall be one sort of theme. It is romantic and annoying. I recall the scene in the second Princess Diaries where Mia makes the statement that her grandma didn’t need a man to help her rule a country, so why should she. She was right, but it is the way the world turns. Getting away from being a singular half seems to be a premise of many Christian colleges (that MR or MRS degree is hugely popular among coeds mingling on a campus), parents and media everywhere. Tradition is an irritating thing! (Cue, Tevye on youtube.)

My mind flitted all over the place with these thoughts. It is a rather fascinating phrase to mull over while driving on icy winter roads.

One thing my butterfly brain touched on was how important it is for a person to be complete within themselves before contemplating joining with another. I remember my own wedding day. As the last words in the ceremony were spoken, I heard the silent panic stricken voice of Kris cry out, ‘what are you doing????’ I was a vulnerable and young single who had no clue what it meant to be myself. I wasn’t ready to be a serious couple or a mom. Life’s road had many exits and this was where I chose to go. It was best at the time.

I then thought of things I’d cut apart which were whole and made into halves. Some of those things may have been halves of a unit, but they were the strangest looking halves ever! How odd is it two totally misshapen things can join to make a whole! Kind of like Jack Sprat and his wife, I guess. (I reckon this is where the words ‘better half’ come from.)

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Then, I wandered over to the place where two halves make nothing more than a hole. (am I digging too deep with this one?) I grew up in a Swiss cheese family. One of those where every slice was nothing more than a piece full of holes. No matter how many halves mum seemed to find, it wasn’t right. I’m not even sure how my daddy managed to stay with her for so long. I do know he was the one adult who made my fractured childhood more complete. Even if I didn’t fully appreciate it at the time.

As I look at my life right now, I don’t see myself as being a part of a half. Not even that misshapen one. It think where I am needs more contemplation while driving. (thinking in most other places leads to naps.) I hope the roads I end up on are not treacherous, but I promise to pay close attention!

9 thoughts on “Two halves

  1. Interesting and thought provoking.
    I believe that one must be whole within oneself before trying to have a serious relationship with another.
    And, how many people are whole within themselves?
    Not many. And, not me.
    ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  2. What? Bare with you? 🤓 Or bear with you? 🐻 I think I’m still messing it up.

    But seriously folks…

    It depends on what the unit is. a crayon is a crayon, but when you put eight colored ones into a box, you have an entirely different kind of a single unit. The individuals still are individuals, all with their unique properties, but unless they’re all present, the box is less than a complete unit.

    The absolute lowest unit of people, that can hope to continue life is the individual person. It only lasts until that person dies. If there’s hope to reproduce life to another generation… and legacy generations, the lowest unit is the two halves of marriage. Each a unique individual, but together, a single unit.

    Romantic and annoying? Yes. Each can do any task of life separate, alone, and independent of the other. Maybe one half doing things better than the other. But one thing neither can do is to create a new life that lives into the next generation all by themselves.

    Which is a better half? Neither. Usually this is a traditional way for one person to give a little prestige to their counterpart in life. A compliment to the other for the unique properties the other one doesn’t possess.

    Completeness, or personal maturity is important since human critters have a tendency to mate for life. You want to be sure of what you’re getting into before its too late to get out. Asking lots of questions first is a way of learning about that potential mate, but also in learning more about yourself in the process. Relying on them to “complete” you is romantic, but knowing yourself, and expectations better helps define areas where that completeness is exactly, and what standards are expected to meet it. What if that person can’t fulfill those expectations out of immaturity? What happens if something goes wrong, a disability, and they can’t meet them any more?

    No one has all the answers, so maybe its a blessing to be a little young and naive going into a marriage.

    See… I can say smart stuff, and not be petty. Now drive safe, and watch out for the 🐻

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Interesting concept. As for me I think of our relationship like that poem of the prophet Kahlil Gibran
    http://www.katsandogz.com/onmarriage.html
    Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
    Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
    Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
    Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
    Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
    Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.

    Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
    For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
    And stand together yet not too near together:
    For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
    And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

    Liked by 1 person

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