I’m full of frustrated frustration. I look at what is causing it and it is mom. She managed to survive the other night, as did her dog. She’s continued to have highs in the higher 400’s, but seems to drop fairly fast back into the 100 range. The doctor is going to do the surgery on Friday morning, but did tell her it might not completely make the numbness and pain go away. She hurts so much in her abdomen, she continues to rest with a heating pad on her tummy. But, on Wednesday….
Breathe, Kris, breathe. I should have brought home ice cream. Not the one that is like a hug, I should have had the kind that is better than sex (ok, not all sex, but most sex!).
I left the house to return my library books. Wait, let me go back in time a bit…..
I did stop by the library on Tuesday to renew mom’s books. I didn’t know she wanted to do that. Before that, I took her to her appointment, stopped at two pharmacies for her (she didn’t feel like going in and turned on the heat to high while I was gone), then the library, I put gas in the car, and stopped at the post. All that time, she was whimpering and hurting and tired declining to move from the car. But, it was because something was ‘stuck’ in her intestine again and she didn’t take her Ritalin. Which brings us to Wednesday. She woke up with the roosters (we don’t have a rooster, but she’d probably have been the first one up!). I was startled. She turned on her oxygen around midnight and went to bed around 2am and then woke at 5 to turn it off and get up! I think she went back to sleep on the couch for naps, but I heard the floor creaking quite a bit. (Not the creaking sounds of settling, but the creaking sounds of busy feet walking around.) I had stayed awake reading and listening for her. (It is hard to drop off if I know she’s not where she’s supposed to be.) Thankfully, I had a good book. I was also VERY annoyed cuz mom’s internet decided to not work. But, as I said, I had a good book.
I had planned to do Kris things on Wednesday. Go to the library and house elf for my friend and take a shower at the house I elf at (in a larger than a phone booth sized shower with a hand held pulsing head on the shower thing. So nice!). I left sort of late, mom was sorting and asked me to wash a bunch of clothes so I could take them to a collection site someday (I didn’t take them today. She wanted me to wait). I did that and ate my lunch and left. By that time, she’d gone out to the garage to sort thru more boxes. (all the time, whimpering away) She keeps asking me if I want many of them, because they are way too big for her and the clothes are probably my size. I refuse most of them, I don’t need more clothes. I live in a basement! (I did take the purple hooded sweatshirt…..)
One of my favorite songs.
As I said, I finally left the house and headed into town. My first stop was my friend’s, where I tidy a bit. I managed to dislodge an impressive tower of balanced periodicals (it was impressive cuz it wasn’t that tall, but it was on one of those TV trays. I’m still in awe at how cleverly stacked they were), but thankfully, I didn’t muddle up too much more. (in case anyone wants to send for a northern house elf. I am really good at cleaning up and managing my own flamingo—see previous post) Predictably, my cell rang while I was listening to Bryan Adams and using the vacuum. (Missed medical calls annoy me, but I’ll talk to them tomorrow.) I had a lovely time in the shower and wished I could have stayed longer! I then picked up a rotisserie chicken for mom’s dinner with some tater salad and coleslaw (I like coleslaw, apparently mom does, too. She was glad I had gotten two kinds of salad!). I then stopped at the library and got not 4 books, but 3. The author was Bradley, the books were in a section with an author I am familiar with, but these books were not ones I knew. (Turned out this author has a different first name, they were just all stuck in the same area.) I got home, parked, and discovered a mess.
Mom doesn’t remember things very well. She says the things she does anyone could do, she is right, but she is getting very forgetful. Unfortunately, this afternoon what she forgot ended up pretty icky. She turned on water in her bathroom sink to do something and forgot to turn it off. It flooded the upstairs bath (and the vanity) and somehow quite a bit of the laundry room, my bathroom, and a bit of the store room adjacent to the bathroom. I don’t understand the flooding pattern, it is different than the usual ones. I was so mad. Then, I remembered this quote I found today. It concerned advice for a girl who thought something she’d done killed a friend, but it fits with most of my life with mom. ‘Mourn properly…but do not take responsibility for actions you had no control over.’ (MZB, A. Norton, M. Lackey) In other words, manage my flamingo and continue to play the game.
I cleaned up the basement, hauled out trash from the deluge above and below stairs, and turned off the light mom left on in the garage. I wonder if I can give mom a smaller flamingo to manage. Like one of the ones I purchased this February?