There are moments when I think I need hammered upside the head. (often!) I run across thoughts and stories and comments that all say the same thing and they are generally in a theme I’m familiar with, but not realizing at the moment. This week is another one of those.
I have a favorite book (OK, I know, I say this all the time, but it is true!! Almost every book I’ve read has special bits in it and so I class them all together under favorite!) Each book, experience, person, and interaction shapes a being in some way. This particular read was an important tool in who I am (as nebulous as that topic is!). It is called ‘A Touch of Wonder’ by Arthur Gordon. It isn’t a churchy book, it is an inspirational one. It isn’t a chapter book or a teaching book, although it does teach. It is full of stories of wonderment. One of the best ones is the last, the story where the book title comes from. (I’d take a photo of it and share that way, but the iPad did that best and well, as you know, it is toast!)
“ ‘There is not enough darkness in all the world to put out the light of one small candle….’
This inscription was found on a small, new gravestone after a devastating air raid on Britain in WW2. Some thought it might be a famous quotation, but it wasn’t. The words were written by a lonely old lady whose pet had been killed by a Nazi bomb.
I have always remembered those words, no so much for their poetry and imagery as for the truth they contain. In moments of discouragement, defeat or even despair, there are always certain things to cling to. Little things, usually: remembered laughter, the face of a sleeping child, a tree in the wind—in fact, any reminder of something deeply felt or dearly loved.
No man is so poor as to not have many of these small candles. When they are lighted darkness goes away…and a touch of wonder remains.”
I had a hard time the last day or so deleting mom from her kindle and taking it over. I’ve been absorbed into so much of mom’s world and have kicked every step of the way. I am so tired of spending money on mom that I will never ever see recouped and yet, when it came time to deregister this small electronic device, it took a few days (it might have been longer, but I really wanted to finish the book I’d started!). It seemed as if I was trying to erase her.
This Sunday, I was thinking about how much of her life has gone on to bring joy to others. People have sent me pictures of skirts, scarves, holiday décor, and told me stories of where mom’s SABLE has spread. Her cat lives in Oregon, I wear her gold nugget watch, and now I’m using her Kindle (for now, I really truly much prefer Apple over Amazon!). She’s not gone, she never will be. When I eventually finish up north with the stuff of Mum and I can finish down here with the SABLE brought back (I refuse to EVER do this to my boys and if I die before I get things sorted here and leave mom’s and my stuff, I’ll move to the far side of the Kingdom of Heaven for a few centuries til I’m not grumpy at mom anymore! I am going to have to unload stuff up there for pennies or donation. I’m not thankful for that, but it will have to be. I cannot keep lollygagging around with this job!). I am looking forward to the day when I can finally step away from hers to see where my own life is going.
In the meantime, I am going to remember to look for candles to keep lighted and the wonder in that magical light. Such as being able to actually walk today without much pain and while outside finding tiny itty bitty spears of daffodil and crocus barely clearing the dead grasses of last summer around the melting snow. (NOTE: this particular pic is from awhile back)