No Sweat

'I joined a gym today and had my first vigorous workout. I thought I was sweating but I think it was my body crying.'

I just figured out why I hate to exercise. I detest sweating and turning red. According to my interpretation of the seasonal color thing, red is a good color for me. Unless it is skin tone. Then, I tend to resemble a washed red delicious, one of the most nasty apples on the face of the earth! When washed, the waxy coating is all blotchy and it feels gicky and you pass it over for something else, like chocolate covered pretzels. Oddly, I like the taste of a light sheen of sweat (sweet and salty is my favorite combination!) but a rank perspiring body is nose crinkling. For this Aquarius, clean is a good aphrodisiac.

It is bizarre that in order to look better, I need to exercise and not look good at all! (NOTE: some people do look great while exercising. I am not one of them!) In the course of things, I honestly think between the less carbs (I did not eat all those fries at dinner the other night, I think I left two or three… and I ate quite a few of my neighbor’s veggies) and the small amount of moving I am doing, I think I may have lost some weight. I’m not entirely sure, though. It is probably a figment of my food deprived imagination. A dream I’ve had in all the sleep I am indulging in! I am going to avoid scales in order to preserve the illusion.

Eating is a security blanket sort of thing. Ice cream and Kit Kats and Jr Mints are my kryptonite. Except lately, I’m not even wanting those. I might have one ‘bar’ of a Kit Kat or a couple of Jr Mints in a day. Ice cream isn’t even interesting anymore. Sweets aren’t that big of a deal. Bread is. The fresh, hot scent of garlic breadsticks sitting in the passenger seat on the way home is more than tempting!

Other delectable things are also tempting. However, with mum getting more aware of life, she’s monitoring the use of her car. I need to make sure to account for the time I’m gone and where I am and who I am with. I’m back to being almost 17 again. Which is probably why I’m being invisible in the basement! Although, to be fair, I don’t want to get to back to that weight. 98 pounds is pretty small and I’d have to lose almost the amount of mum’s age to get there! (Phew, I am a chunky girl!) She does want me to take care of the yard pretty soon, and that will be my exercise tonight. Actually, what she said was that she needs to do some yard work and she’ll have to wait until she feels a bit stronger, unless I get to it first. I was seriously hoping the kid next door would do the mowing part, but it appears the neighbors are gone. Bother and piffle!

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