I visited a friend yesterday. I wasn’t going to, but realised I’d feel bad if I didn’t. Sometimes, you just need to make thought into action. I entered her house, got a hug, and burst into tears. I sat with my head on the arm of her chair near this fire, crying and telling her things only my teddy bear knows. And I felt better for that 15 minutes. And I felt bad, too. Her life long love died a few months ago from something similar to what mum has. He died and left her so alone. I felt I didn’t have a right to cry, but she let me.
Today? Today has been horrible. Life with mum is a yoyo. We went to the dr this morning and she went on stage and was relatively ok. The doctor looked her over, gave her some instructions, and changed her insulin. When we got home, she was a different person entirely. She is so sick, she was curled up in her chair in pain. It appears the tortellini I made for dinner last night didn’t get chewed up enough and is stuck in her single intestine. Her leg aches and is hot (the dr told her to put ice on it, she doesn’t want to do that). And she hardly ate anything tonight. She went to bed early. She is twitching in her sleep. She does not feel good. Yet, she is ‘fine’. Ridiculous!